I keep secrets from you

I like the Idea, Not you! The idea of you with me But not us willingly!

I'm not sure if you understand, Understand what I'm saying, the words that you're hearing.

I believe that you're a good person But all I see are good genes to give me a pretty baby. I think that I know you But to be honest, I just don't seem to get you.

Well there was a time when i would say Yes! And No! But now all I see are maybes. I'm not sure if you understand Understand the words that you're hearing.

The fact that I love the idea of loving you And not that I actually LOVE you.

The reasons why we still talk, are questionable to me. Yet, I reply 10 seconds after each message.

Sometimes I wonder if you'd realize, Look beyond and see pass through your feelings And see what I see

But NO! you stay and smile and talk and talk again!

It hurts that I'm not even listening,

So I'd nod yes and smile and nod again

You fell for it !

I'm not sure if you're listening,

or hearing the words I'm saying,

because I don't feel a thing.

I just know that you're you,

that your heart is fragile. I just know that I don't want to hurt you So I stay, I laugh, I nod ,I cry And you never see it. I know you will not be the same

If you knew how I felt.

Deep down I'm hurting Hurting because I am unable to express, My hurt! My pain! My feelings! My emotions! I put you first because I see you're trying.

If only you knew how ice cold my heart is,

that even the strongest fire

would not melt

you'd see pass through what you feel

and see that I am really just not that into you!

Hello everyone! I've been gone for sometime and I am so sorry and I really would like to thank those of you who kept messaging and asking. I was not sick or anything, just been having some personal issues that I needed to sort out and also trying to find time to actually start writing. I won't promise that I will be back full time every week but I can say that I'll try.

For my one year anniversary next month I will be posting a year in review as to how this blog has impacted my life and others so far. I can not wait to hear from you guys and I hope you do enjoy this poem!

Love,

SJ